Republican Newspaper Freaks Out After AOC Gets A Haircut

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Published on 10 Oct 2019, 19:00
The Washington Times, a right wing propaganda outlet, has written an “exclusive” article that was meant to take down Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Her crime? Paying for an expensive haircut. The paper claims that her “socialist” values shouldn’t allow her to do the things that normal human beings do, which is one of the most absurd claims imaginable. Ring of Fire’s Farron Cousins discusses this.
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*This transcript was generated by a third-party transcription software company, so please excuse any typos.

Well folks, two very brave journalists from the Washington times have uncovered the scoop of the century that is absolutely going to destroy the career, nay. The life of representative Alexandria Ocasio Cortez, they have somehow done the digging, made the phone calls, and they have uncovered the biggest scandal we have ever seen in American politics. And here it is. She got a haircut. I, I wish I was exaggerating, but here is the headline that the Washington times used exclusive, all caps, self declared socialists, AOC splurges on high dollar hairdo. Now this a little under two page article was actually written by two people. It took two people to write this, two men, Alex Sawyer and Jeff Murdoch. And they point out that last month AOC went to a salon there in Washington, D C spent $80 on a haircut and then had to spend $180 for low lights in her hair. And then of course she had to leave the tip. So they're estimating that this may have cost her a little over $300 for a haircut. And I mean if she's a self-described socialist, then obviously that somehow excludes her from being able to get her hair done. Now I'm going to go ahead and make pretty bold assumption here. I don't think that Alex Sawyer or mr Jeff Murdoch have ever been in a relationship with a woman. I'm going to go ahead and assume that because if they had, they would understand that. Guess what folks? Women have to pay a hell of a lot of money to get their hair done. It's ridiculous. It's insane, but that's what happens. That's why they don't get it done all the time. Unless you're a real housewife of Beverly Hills. So yeah, going once or twice a year to spend $300 on, on a hairdo. Sure. Really nothing wrong with that. That doesn't compromise your principles in any way yet. These two morons seem to think that, Oh, this is done. She's out. This is into her career and they actually ran this, tweeted it out multiple times yesterday as if it's some kind of massive scoop that's going to rock the foundation of Washington D C they also pointed out that there is apparently a government subsidized hair salon, barber shop, really, uh, that some members of Congress use and she could have saved roughly a hundred dollars had she gone there and they pointed out that Jeff sessions used to go there and get his hair cut for $20 Jeff sessions could go to sports clips and get his hair cut for $12. Why aren't they doing an article about that? Jeff sessions getting ripped off on haircuts, but folks, these, the links that these crazy people and they're crazy people will go to to try to smear this woman. Why? Because she wants to make the country a little bit better because she thinks we need to take care of the environment that we need to take care of the people and that we need to take on corporate power. So this is how low they will sink, and this is how little ammunition they have against her to act like her getting a haircut is somehow a career ending event.

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